deblissed.com

I'm good at making executive decisions. I walk into the boardroom and bend to Young Chyna Feingoldwaiths ear and yell, "Mother Fucker, Mother Fucker, Mother Fucker!!" Other examples can be found when I'm out working in the field. I go right up to the hired help and show them that I'm perfectly capable of sticking my wiggling hand through my pants' zipper hole. If the young manager fails to learn by these examples, all he can hope for is a career. What's up with that??!!

My mother had me at the age of five. That was twelve years after she gave birth to me and my two older sisters. It was the second round for my sisters. My mother suffered from psychosomatic dementia, which is why I never told her about my cravings for saltines and bong water. We still enjoy each other's company, especially when we're talking about oatmeal.Her generosity was boundless--always letting me watch porn with Aunt Lupita. I do feel I owe a debt to my mother for shaping me into the man I am today. I send her monthly gift baskets filled with action figures modeled after stars from the power yoga movement. By the way, traditional values are important to me. I don't like all this modern lighting.

For being an asian country, full of asians, and having companies like Nikon who put logic into their damned digital cameras that think that asians -- asian asians -- are blinking all the time. What fucking kind of camera should be worried about it in the first place. Take my damned pictures of asians! If I want to take a picture of a blinking asian then question me but dont tell me that asians are blinking.

Mr. Pastey himself, Harry Reid is being asked to step down by racist republicans (including Micheal Steele) for stating what is a racist truth about our country. A blacker man (physically and culturally) could not have been elected. These mother fuckers think (and maybe they can) they can get away with comparing this situation with that of Strom Thurman which is sick at best. Thurman conducted the longest filibuster by a single US senator in opposition to the Civil Rights act of 1957. What a dickhead! I think Mr. Steele must be sucking a lot of GOP cock.

All these damn indie kids are all giddy over the band Spoon. But what about the utensil? Think of its contribution. Human beings are wretched creatures with no humility. But the spoon, the spoon is both humble and noble. The spoon will be here after we're gone and after the cockroaches write their first novels.

When I think of nutella, I sing to Melinda Melinda. Melinda do you sing to me?

love me love me love me love me love me love me love me love me love me love me love me love me love me love me love me. Don't love me.

Look here Ms. Dionne Warwick. I don't care how you stew your pork. This world is begging to move forward and I'll be damned if I'm gonna allow you to push your porn sci fi any longer. Do you enjoy being anti-humanist? The thought of hearing the answer to that question gives me nightmares. You probably fuck animals.

Fuck You Dione Warwick!! Fuck you!!